If Hollywood were to produce a blockbuster film addressing the many misunderstandings surrounding BDSM, the title would be 50 Shades of Grey Area.
There is a wealth of incorrect data available on BDSM, ranging from out-of-date assumptions to wholly inaccurate depictions. Even if kink exploration is not your thing, learning what the pros have to say about BDSM is a great way to get the facts.
Understanding the Basics of BDSM
The vast majority of people have limited knowledge of BDSM. Therefore, they fabricate meanings for those who partake. People’s prejudice against BDSM stems, in large part, from their ignorance of the topic. So, it really makes sense to delve a bit deeper and bust those common misconceptions about BDSM.
Kinks Are Not Abusive and Torturing
One of the biggest myths about BDSM is that if you are into a kink lifestyle, you will have to be abusive toward your partner.
No doubt, the word “BDSM” brings up pictures of high-heeled, leather-clad, whip-wielding dominatrixes, and if you believe in that, you may also be under the impression that there is no BDSM without pain. Right? Wrong!
The truth is that it is possible to engage in BDSM and not inflict pain on any partner. It gets even more comfortable if you do it with a trained and experienced partner. This way, you can craft the play keeping your expectations in mind. But, whatever the case, you need to realize that BDSM is in no way about pain and violence.
It is Not Hard to Find a Like-minded Partner
How different people perceive BDSM can vary a lot. For some, it is all about ice cubes and feathers. For others, it involves paddles, ropes, and some hardcore fun. Therefore, it is natural to find it difficult to connect with someone who thinks like you. Not to mention that straight and gay BDSM practices usually differ a lot.
However, it is also a myth that you just cannot find like-minded partners to experience true BDSM being gay. In fact, it is now as simple as going online and joining gay BDSM dating sites and apps made specifically for gay men into BDSM. So many reputable platforms are now available, and they not only help you find an experienced gay partner but let you spend time in chat rooms to improve your knowledge about the kink lifestyle.
And the good thing is that finding the best site has become easier with top-rated review sites. By researching gay BDSM dating sites or apps, you will be in a much better position to call the shots. The idea is to compare the top players in the industry and pick one that looks affordable but offers amazing features as well. And that is very much possible!
BDSM is About Consent, Not Forcing
BDSM is nothing without consent, which is another reason BDSM dating sites are growing in popularity. Since everyone knows why they are on these sites, you find it easier to connect with someone who is willing to try it out with you in real.
However, you need to understand that even if you find someone on a BDSM dating site, you should not take it as a sign that they are ready for just about anything. BDSM is never about forcing.
Consent and goals must be discussed prior to initiating BDSM, just as they would be for any sexual interaction. As a result of open and honest dialogue, BDSM is completely mutually agreed upon by all parties.
Some activities may involve what looks like aggressive physical contact but is actually the expression of a prearranged power dynamic. When practicing BDSM, all parties must be honest and open with one another.
Submission Doesn’t Equal Low Self-Esteem
A big misconception about BDSM is that those who choose to submit usually have low self-esteem. This is so not true and depicts a mindset people have about a kinky lifestyle. In fact, you will find many top celebrities with loads of confidence doing it, and the list includes Rihanna & Armie Hammer and Ricky Martin & Carmen Electra.
The truth is that those who engage in BDSM are often seen as grotesque or weird. But, in fact, there is no life experience, health condition, or any specific reason why some people would engage in BDSM.
There is a widespread misunderstanding that kink sex or BDSM are only appealing to persons who have experienced some form of trauma or abuse in their formative years. Again, it is not true. On the contrary, most people who say they like and practice BDSM do not cite past trauma as a motivation for doing so.
Conclusion
The crux of the matter is that if you think BDSM involves violence and painful acts or it is just a way to forget about your traumatic experiences, you do not know much about this lifestyle. A great idea would be to join dating sites and interact with people who have experience with BDSM to know exactly what it means. And that will definitely change the way you may have been approaching this topic.
